Do you know the saying “Dogs are a man’s best friend”? It’s actually true. But dogs are in a tight spot, which makes me appreciate them even more. As it turns out, dogs are the peacekeepers between extraterrestrials and humans. I’ve been studying dogs lately and trying to communicate with them telepathically, but I think they have been trained to ignore that type of nonverbal communication because if they show any indication that they can indeed hear the thoughts of humans, then the jig would be up.
For over a few thousand millennia, way before the existence of humans. Dogs and aliens were closer than peanut butter and jelly between two slices of bread. When the aliens had to go into hiding, they made a pact with dogs not to reveal the secret of their existence; in return, the aliens would not destroy planet Earth. Even though dogs must keep it under wraps that aliens exist, they agreed to be their spies. As we know, dogs are a loyal and intelligent species, so of course, they will hold up their end of the bargain.
So you might be wondering how I know this delicate information about dogs and aliens. I’ll tell you. One day, when I left to head to the store, I realized that I had left my wallet behind. I had just had my floors waxed and didn’t want to mess up the new polish, so as I came back into the house, I removed my shoes and proceeded to walk in my socked feet. As I approached the living room from the kitchen, I heard something strange. It sounded like “Boop Bop Doop Dooba” then I heard my dog bark twice before I heard “Dooba, Beep, Boo-Boo.”. And as I rounded the corner, I saw something that made me stop in my tracks. It was a creature with wide black eyes and pale green skin. It stood about 9 inches tall, and it was talking to my dog!
I screamed, startling both my dog and the alien creature. My dog instinctively put his ears back and widened his eyes, giving me a guilty look. The alien creature seemed to go into attack mode as it clawed up its fingers and began walking towards me. My dog, realizing what was about to happen, stepped between me and the creature, and the alien stopped moving but kept its gaze on me. It seemed like forever, but it was only a matter of seconds before the alien began backing away, and then it took off towards the vent in the dining room. The grate was loosened from the vent, and I suspect that’s where the alien came in from. I stood there in complete shock until my dog approached me, wagging his tail as if nothing had happened.
This happened about 5 months ago, and this is the first time I’m telling anyone about it. I figured no one would believe me. Earth hasn’t been destroyed, so I think we’re in the clear. I can’t afford to move, so I did the next best thing: I reattached the vent to the wall and put a heavy-duty hutch in front of it, and I haven’t seen the alien since.
So next time you leave your dog alone in the house, just know they probably have company. Next time you come home and your house is a mess because your “dog” got into the trash, it probably wasn’t them, but an alien looking for information on you. The next time you come home and something is destroyed, it might be because your dog won’t give an alien any information about you, and the alien gets mad and tears up something. You see, because extraterrestrials love dogs, but dogs love humans.
Author’s note: Okay, I thought of the idea of dogs and aliens being friends and getting into all types of trouble when humans aren’t around, and that’s where this story was birthed from. I don’t know where I was going with the telepathically trying to communicate with dogs bit, but I thought it was a creative sentiment worth sharing with the reader. I laughed at the ridiculousness of some of this story, so I hope you will too. It’s all in good fun!