I just realized that I’ve lost my creative spark and I need to find it again. When I first started back up with this blog, writing felt so fluid, but over the past month, I’ve struggled to produce much. I think that’s why I’ve been inconsistent lately with these blog posts. After some reflection this evening, I realized that I have a brain fog, and I think that’s blocking me from thinking of what to write about. The most frustrating thing is, I have absolutely no clue how to get rid of my brain fog.
I enjoy writing, and I said from the very beginning that if it becomes a chore, it will no longer be fun for me. I want to write, and I want to keep at it unless I know for certain it’s not for me. I just feel so mentally dense lately, but at least I’m starting to understand now why writing seems to have become a struggle for me.
So, I need to get my creative spark back. At this time, I don’t know what it’s going to take or even where to begin. I don’t know; maybe I should read books more and look at artwork. I’ve just gotten back into listening to calming music, hoping that will clear up my mind a bit and inspire me. And perhaps a change of scenery now and then will help those creative juices flow. One thing I’ve learned since starting this writing venture is that I also have to try to recall my dreams more. I’ve woken up several times from dreams and thought, “I could write about that”.
The thing is, when I think about what I want to do for the rest of my life, being a writer is all I really want to do in the professional sense. The catch is, I don’t want to write for anyone else but the reader(s). That means I don’t want to be hired to write for anyone else. I want to make my own way as a writer. The lifestyle of a writer (especially a successful one) suits what I want. I want to be a writer because I can do that solo, from the comfort of anywhere, but more importantly, it allows me to be as creative as I want to be. I don’t have to get up early in the morning to report to an office building while I’m still sleepy, and I don’t even have to change out of my pajamas if I don’t want to. I know it might seem simple, but that makes a huge difference to me.
That being said, I am happy with how far I’ve come so far in my writing journey, and I’m curious to see where I end up and how far I’ll go. During this course of my life, I’ve learned what I struggle with the most, which is transcribing my thoughts to the page. Even though communicating what I think in text is a challenge, I think the more I practice doing it, the better I will become…at least, I hope so. Although AI has made things easier, I don’t want my writing to be produced by it. I want my writing to be original and organic. The good news is, I have a platform, and I’ve already put myself out there, so that’s a start. Now I just have to keep going.