Everyone has secrets, except for probably babies. Well, I guess babies have secrets too because they do have dreams while they’re sleeping about who knows what. I have secrets, but I don’t think I have many. Yes, I have a few secrets, but I realize the older I get, the more I tend to let them slip out somewhere along the way. That’s not to say that I’m not good at keeping secrets; it’s just that at some point in life, there is no need to hold on to them anymore. At least, the trivial ones. I drop “anonymous” secrets when something comes to me that’s just too big for me to deal with. All of a sudden, pronouns become my best friend instead of names, and I inexplicably have a case of amnesia when it comes to remembering dates and times of events.
There are various types of secrets. There are those secrets that can be fun and a source of mystery. Then some secrets can ruin a reputation or a relationship in a matter of seconds, after years of building. Some secrets can eat someone alive, so I guess to that point it’s probably best to let someone in on what’s going on. Other secrets are just downright hurtful to expose. So, my question in that case would be: “What’s the point of sharing the secret?” Then there are those secrets that no one really cares about other than the person holding them, but they view it as so shameful that they dare not say anything about it. Then there is the dreaded “Take this to the grave” secret that you just know is juicy! You know what I’m talking about, right? The ones that you just can’t wait to hear.
Excluding the secrets I mentioned earlier, the ones that by the time I do share them, it’s old news, I have learned that when it comes to secrets, it’s best to just let them end with me…that is, unless someone is in danger or is being harmed in some way. Besides, most secrets need to be proven to be true. And there are consequences for sharing someone’s secret. Go out into the world spreading someone’s “business”, and it’s not true at all, and end up looking like an unreliable person. Or worse yet, the person gets mad at you for gossiping about them, and now you have a lifelong enemy to contend with. There’s also karma, if you believe in that sort of thing. What you do to others will one way or another be done to you. There are just too many things that can go wrong when you tell someone’s secret. Is all that really worth a few minutes of guilty pleasure by sharing a secret?
If it’s my business to share and I feel comfortable sharing it, so be it, but if I trust someone else with something private and I find out they let it slip, then I know that person is not to be trusted again. A wise person once said if you want to know if you can trust someone, tell them something in confidence you don’t care about getting out, and sit back and wait. If you find out that person kept your secret to themselves, you know you have a keeper.
Nothing can be as funny or as deadly to show someone’s character as a secret revealed. So, at what point should a skeleton remain in the closet? I guess at the end of the day, one has to use discernment to decide if a secret should be shared. Sometimes, a skeleton in a closet is just that, a skeleton, and it shouldn’t be disturbed. Other times, if it’s still rotting, maybe it’s good to get it out of there before it stinks up the whole place.